Tag Archives: my world

Counting Down to JYJ-28 days

From today, there’s exactly 4 weeks until I see JYJ in concert. Even though I’m still disappointed with my seats, I’ve decided to focus on the positive: I’M FINALLY GOING TO SEE JYJ IN CONCERT! So, to celebrate, I’m going to try posting something awesome and JYJ related every day until the concert.

Today, I start with one of their music videos. This song is from their In Heaven album. It’s one of only 2 songs from that album that they made an MV for. The song and video is about discovering your girlfriend is cheating on you with one of your friends… I can’t imagine why anyone would want to cheat on any of the 3 of them. (Well, I mean, I could be tempted away from either of the other 2 by Junsu, but that’s just cuz Junsu is my ultimate, be-all and end-all perfect man, so that doesn’t count. 😉 )

Anyway, here it is:

Get Out

This video is one of my favourites, because all 3 guys look great in it. It’s definitely among my top 3 looks for all 3 of them.
I like Yoochun best with longer hair, but the short hair and a suit works really well for him too. And in the dancing scenes, when he’s not wearing the muscle shirt and vest combo, his arms look fantastic.

And speaking of arms: JUNSU! OMG JUNSU’S ARMS! Junsu looks amAAAAzing in this video. His arms are all toned and sexy and I love both the colour and style of his hair, which is something that doesn’t always happen. Junsu sometimes makes haircolour choices that aren’t my favourite, but in this MV, he’s right on target. And whether he’s sporting the muscle shirt and vest arm-bearing combo, or the sexy suit, or the silver jacket, he looks fantastic. And yes, I admit I’m a bit biased, but just look at him in this MV, he looks great. You can’t argue against that.

Not to be outdone by his dongsaengs, Jaejoong is in peak form in this MV. It’s perhaps my favourite look for Jaejoong – or at least tied with Mirotic era Jae… I always flip flop between those two looks. But anyway, I digress, he looks stunning here. The dark hair styled up off of his face is just perfect, and the scenes with him in a suit make melt just a little bit.

Get Out is one of my favourite songs to dance around to (at home, where nobody can see me!) I know when they play it at the concert I won’t be able to resist dancing and singing along, no matter how terribly I do it…


Ecstasy and Agony

Sooo… last night the 2nd round of JYJ ticket sales happened. Just like last Wednesday, my friend and I headed to the local PC 방 (faster internet than the crappy connections we get in our building), hoping this time we would be successful, since last week’s venture left us empty handed. I logged in to my Interpark account, and at 8:00 pm on the dot, I tried to pull tickets. SUCCESS! I got 3 tickets in the VIP section within the red oval:

seating map

JYJ concert seating map – Seoul August 2014


Life could not possibly get better! Those seats were literally a dream come true for me and I had them in my hot little virtual hands!

I proceeded through the ticket purchase process – something I’ve done at least a dozen times by now, so I can do it quite easily, even in Korean – and got all the way to the screen where you select the method of payment, but for some reason, the list of bank cards wasn’t coming up, and where the ‘Next’ button usually is, it said  잠시만 기다려주세요,  so I waited for a bit. But I also didn’t want to wait too long and lose my tickets, and there was that little ! in the status bar at the bottom of the window that indicated an error, so I had my friend on the computer next to me try to grab a single ticket elsewhere and see what happens if you hit the ‘previous screen’ button. She did and the tickets were still intact, so I decided to back one step and then try again, hoping that when I got to the payment screen, my tickets would still be there, and they were! I was successful!  Yay!

It allowed me to select the method of payment and move forward one step. Then… when it came time to input my card details, there was a notation of an Active X that needed to be allowed. So I allowed it, because otherwise I couldn’t proceed. AND THE DAMN PAGE REFRESHED BACK TO THE BEGINNING AND RELEASED MY TICKETS!!!!!!! And try as I might, I never got them back.

So, now, I’m stuck sitting in the seats within the navy triangle on the map above. It’s a far cry from what I had been in reach of just moments before. Now, unless you’re a  huge, devoted fan of something, the way I am of JYJ, you might not understand how I feel, but let me tell you that my heart literally hurts and tears well up in my eyes when I think of it. So I am doing my best to try not to think of it, and just focus on the fact that we got tickets, which is much better than our attempt last week, and that I will finally, after years of waiting, get to see JYJ together. Live. In concert. Making magic like only they can.

But I needed to get it all out of my system in order to move on, hence the post.

I’ve also decided that I’m going to try to get a ticket for their Hong Kong concert the following week and change my flight for my trip to Japan to accommodate a side trip to Hong Kong… They have general admission floor tickets, and that’s what I’m aiming for. Wish me luck! Maybe third time’s a charm?

Oh, and just in case you want to see what I mean about JYJ’s synergy as they perform In Heaven, you can watch a fancam here. It’s a great performance, and the synergy part really kicks into high gear around the 3:37 mark.


Ew. Ew. EWWWWW!!!!


You know when you see a bit of thread or fluff on your floor and get momentarily startled, thinking it’s a bug? Well I just had the opposite thing happen. I saw what I thought was some stray thread kinda balled up on my floor (not wearing my glasses or contacts) so I bent down, picked it up, and just kinda rolled it between my fingers to ball it up more. But then it felt kinda crunchy and not threadlike at all. It was a spider. Which I picked up and unknowingly killed with my bare fingers.

And it crunched!

In my bare fricken fingers! Which I’ve washed 3 times now, but they still feel like dead spider. I know it’s all in my head, but srsly, I need to bleach my brain or something after that!

I think I may go barf now.

Father’s Day… bah humbug

March 3, 2000: The day that made me forever feel sad, lonely, and, I have to admit, a bit resentful on every single Father’s Day that has come and gone since.

I foolishly hoped that moving to Korea, where they don’t celebrate Mother’s Day and Father’s Day, (they have Parents’ Day in May) I could escape those feelings this year, but, of course, this is the era of social media, which means I’m never truly all that far from home. So, even though it’s still Saturday night on the other side of the Pacific, my Facebook news feed is already filled with people thanking their fathers and/or husbands for being great dads, and people changing their profile pics to ones with their dad. I don’t have any digital pics of me with mine, unfortunately, so I can’t even do that. 😦 So, here I am, yet again, feeling resentful toward every girl out there who still has their daddy, and missing mine even more than I do on a daily basis. And, instead of having Korea be a safe haven where I can escape displays of a happiness that I can’t feel on this day anymore, being here has actually compounded the loneliness I feel every Father’s Day, because I’m all by myself while my family is together for our annual golf tournament. Last year at this time I was being “serenaded” my nephew D and my cousin O, with a chorus of “Trea to Korea, Trea to Korea…” Granted, they were doing it to be brats cuz they were hassling my oldest brother and I hassled them back on his behalf, but damn, what I wouldn’t give to hear that sassy little refrain right about now.

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t regret being here in Korea. I love it here. It’s a beautiful country with lots of things to do and see, and I’ve met some wonderful people that have made being in a country whose language I don’t speak much less lonely, and often quite the opposite. The decision I made a little over a year ago to uproot my comfortable little living situation and move to the other side of the globe was one of my better ones. But life is what it is, so that means sometimes it’s awesome being here, and other times it’s hard. Today, I’m just having one of those moments where it’s kind of hard.

I miss my Dad. After 14 years, I still think about him every single day of my life, and I still feel an empty space in my heart that used to belong to him. I miss his voice mail messages saying “Trea, it’s your favourite father. Call me so I know you’re not dead in a ditch somewhere.” I miss his chicken noodle soup whenever I’ve got a cold (and I think I’m coming down with one now, dammit). It was just the Lipton’s dry packets, but he knew exactly how much of the flavour cube to put in to make it taste just right (cuz the full thing was way too much) , and the exact time to take it off the stove so the noodles were the perfect level of doneness. I miss him playing guitar and singing. I miss his twisted sense of humour and his willingness to be silly once in a while, just for the sake of amusing me (and himself). I miss debating and arguing with him (cuz we almost never agreed on anything), and sometimes I even miss fighting with him. At least, when we were fighting, he was still alive, you know? Bottom line is, I miss him like crazy and I hate the month of June because first we have Father’s Day, and then there’s his birthday on June 25th. It’s a double-whammy month for me, and being away from home hasn’t really done much to take the edge off of it. 😦

Anyway, this is just me being all emo… A girl’s gotta play to her strengths after all. Happy Father’s Day to all the dads and dads-to-be out there! And to all the girls who are lucky enough to still have their dads in their lives… cherish that fact, because one day you won’t, and you may find yourself missing him so much that even the things about him that currently make you want to throttle him don’t seem so bad after all.

I think I’ll make myself kinda scarce on Facebook for the next 24 hours, listen to a whole bunch of K-pop and pretend the rest of the world doesn’t exist…  Catch you on the flip side…

New Year’s Eve thinky thoughts


With a little less than 5 hours left in 2013 for me, I feel the need to reflect for a moment or two.

This has been an interesting year. The first half was uncomfortable for me. I felt isolated a lot, both at home and at work. Ahh… work… yeah… Work made me really unhappy a lot of the time. Not as unhappy as my first year managing the training team, cuz that was disastrously stressful, but it definitely wasn’t making me feel fulfilled. Or useful. And I think that feeling seeped into my non-work life as well.

Fortunately, I  have some good friends near and far (especially my KDKP fam) who helped prop me up when I needed some extra TLC. And I had Kpop. Roll your eyes if you want. Shake your head and judge me as a weirdo and crazy fangirl if you need to, but the truth is, Kpop is my happy place, and has been for a few years now. It’s my escape from all manner of stressful emotions: whether I feel sad, angry, frustrated, worthless, overwhelmed… whatever negative emotion I feel, if I immerse myself in Kpop for a while, that feeling dissipates. I don’t know why it works that way for me, but I’m not gonna question it.

Kpop also played a part in my decision to quit my job and move to Korea to teach English. It wasn’t the REASON I came to Korea to teach – my interest in Korean culture goes beyond pop culture, and my desire to teach English overseas goes back many years – but the idea that living in Korea could mean more opportunities to see Kpop shows, and specifically to see JYJ live in their own country, gave me the courage to cast aside my fear of rejection and ignore the large part of my brain that kept screaming “No, you don’t like change! Change is scary! Change is bad! Don’t do that!!!”

So, despite 2013’s rocky first half, today I sit here on New Year’s Eve happier and more content than I’ve been on any NYE in recent memory. I love my job to the point that I didn’t mind working until 4:40 today, because it meant hanging out with my rural school students watching Star Wars, decorating cupcakes to look like Princess Leia, having battles with lightsabres made of animal balloons and laughing my butt off on more than one occasion. I’m going on about 4 hours of sleep, because yesterday, I booked it to the bus terminal after school, hopped on a bus to Seoul, met my friend at the subway and headed to Jamsil Sports Complex to see Junsu (yes, JUNSU!!!) in concert. Afterward, we stayed up talking until way too late, then I woke up a good 2 hours before sunrise, hopped on the subway, headed to the bus terminal, then got on a bus back home to Chungju so I could get washed up and ready for my afternoon at school running English Camp. Yet, despite being tired, I’m happy. And I’m going to head upstairs to one of the other English teacher’s apartments where a bunch of us are going to enjoy a Mexican themed evening filled with games, yummy food, sangria, and, I’m sure lots and lots of laughs. Yeah, not a bad way to welcome in 2014. 🙂

Happy New Year, everyone! If 2013 was good to you, I hope that trend continues. If it’s a year you’re happy to see the end of, I hope 2014 is much more to your liking.

Living in Korea

Okay, okay. I know I promised I’d blog regularly about my experiences in Korea, and here I am a month and a half into my time here and only writing my first one. I promise I will try to change my lazy ways and blog more frequently from here on out.

Right now, I’m sitting in the English classroom at my main school. This is the view from my desk.

I’m an English Teacher at 2 different elementary schools. One in Chungju, a city in the middle of South Korea, with a population of about 200,000 people (and where I currently live) and the other is in a rural school about a 40 minute drive away. I’m lucky in that my classes at the main school average about 22 students per class. We were told it’s not uncommon to have 30-40 kids in a public school class, so 22 is awesome! In my main school, I teach grades 3 and 5. At my rural school there’s a total of 30 kids from grades 1-6, and I teach all grades. My largest class there is 8 kids (my grade sixes, whom I love – they’re seriously some of the most awesome and fun kids I’ve ever met) and my smallest classes have 4 kids.

I’m really happy with both of my schools. I know some people who have some really tough classes, but most of my kids are pretty good. Sometimes I want to throttle a few of the students in my 3-3 class, but even the naughty ones usually settle down when the threat of not being able to play the planned game or losing a class sticker is looming.

As for my living situation here in Chungju, it’s actually pretty cool. My apartment is nothing special, it’s basically a bachelor unit. I’ll try to do a video tour at some point soon and post it. But what is cool is that I live in a building with a bunch of other EPIK teachers, so I’m now neighbours with some of the people I met at Orientation. Plus there’s a bunch of other teachers who were already here (both EPIK and hagwon (private school) teachers) and they’ve even got a Facebook group, so when you have questions like ‘Um, how do I work the washing machine, everything is in Korean?’ There’s a place to turn to for help. It also means that when I want to go out for dinner, I can usually find someone to go out with. Overall, I’m liking my current situation. Now if I could only find a weekend where I don’t have plans in another city so I can actually explore my own city, that would be nice… 😉

A daughter’s lament

[NOTE: This post is of a personal nature and has nothing to do with Kpop whatsoever. Please feel free to scroll right on by…]

Thirteen years feels both like a lifetime and a moment…

I spent most of my day today being busy. My sister, BiL, nephew and I joined my mom at church. (Me in church and lighting didn’t strike!!! Miracles do happen.) After church, we all went for breakfast and then went back to my sis’ place for a while.  When I drove my mom home, I went in for a bit and played tech guru with her iPhone and iTunes, and then we watched Princess Diaries on TV (silly show, but I get sucked in every time). But now, I’m home and the sadness I was ignoring all day has hit me like a tonne of bricks.

It was around this time of the evening on March 3, 2000 that my dad passed away. (Note: I started writing this shortly after 10pm.) He had been in the hospital all day, after we rushed him there in the morning when he had taken yet another turn for the worse.  Just two days before, he was okay. I mean, not healthy by any means, he was in pain and weak and sleeping a lot, but he was alert and speaking with everyone. Then on March 2, he took a turn for the worse, and spent the day going back and forth from being lucid and present to re-living the past in his head.  That night, instead of going home, I was going over to my sister’s place, since she lived around the corner, and we planned to return to my parent’s place first thing in the morning. When I went in to say goodbye to my dad, I didn’t expect much of a response, since he had been in his own world most of the evening, but he grabbed my hand and asked how I was getting home at that hour. I said I was going with my sister to her place, and he said that was okay.

My mom ended up calling us early in the morning on March 3, to let us know that Dad had taken another turn for the worse and was not at all lucid, so she had called an ambulance. A couple of my cousins were there with my parents, so my sister and I literally splashed water on our faces, threw on the same clothes we had on the day before and rushed to my mom’s to pick up the others and follow the ambulance to the hospital.

All day long, he lay there on his emergency room stretcher, clearly in pain, having trouble breathing, and not really present at all. The doctor said he would be like that for a while, and then some time within the next 48 hours, he would slip into a coma, from there, at some point, he would pass away. He was working on getting a bed for my dad in the palliative care ward, which finally happened in the late afternoon. After my dad was safely ensconced in his room, and some of my brothers had arrived at the hospital, I left with my best friend to go home to shower, change, and bring some clothes and toiletries with me. My mom and sister did the same, since, based on what the doctor said, we were going to be spending time in the hospital around the clock. We got back in the early evening. My dad’s sisters were all there, as were all of my brothers except one, who went home to pick up his wife and kids. (He lived out of town, and in the end, he didn’t get back in time.)

As the evening grew later, my dad’s breathing grew more laboured. We each took turns standing around his hospital bed, holding his hand and speaking softly to him.  He was having more lucid moments that evening than he had earlier in the day, which was comforting. One of those moments occurred during the last time I was standing by the bed speaking to him.  I don’t remember what I was saying to him, but I started crying, and he said to me, “Don’t cry.” So I replied, “You know I’ve never been good to listen, Dad,” and he nodded in agreement. I told him I loved him and he said, “I love you too.” Then, because he has 8 sisters who all wanted to spend some time with him, I moved away and sat in a chair against the wall, at the foot of the bed. He didn’t say anything else.

I know this sounds weird, but I knew he was gone the moment it happened, even though I was in that chair and a bunch of people were around the bed, blocking my view.  The reason I knew, is because, out of the blue, I heard my dad singing to me, clear as day.  He used to sing this George Jones song called “She’s Mine” which was about a father expressing his love for his little girl who had lost her mom:

I loved him singing that song when I was little, but I hadn’t heard it in years, and there it was, in my head as loud and clear as if he was sitting next to me with the guitar singing away. A moment later, someone standing by his bed said, “He’s not responding, call a nurse,” and not even a minute later, a nurse walked in the room to check on my dad, and she told us he was gone.

So, no 48 hours, no coma, just gone. That was probably for the best, rather than having him continue to suffer, but that really didn’t make things any easier. The last words my dad spoke in this world were to me.  We fought like cats and dogs, my dad and I, but despite it all, I was Daddy’s little girl. No matter how angry we got with each other, and what words were said in that anger (and we both said some real doosies), I always knew my dad loved me. I was his baby, and nobody on the planet ever loved me as much as he did. I doubt anyone ever will.

Anyway, it’s been thirteen years and I still think of him every single day, and I still miss him to the point that my heart physically aches. I’ve never written an account of that day, and I don’t know why I am doing it here and now, but apparently I needed to. Luckily I don’t have many followers, so I’m not torturing too many people with my emo.

Kim Jaejoong is a Rock Star

I want to start off this post by saying I love, love, LOVE MTVK for airing an interview with Kim Jaejoong. It is so rare for us JYJ fangirls to see our boys on any sort of broadcast outside their own YouTube channel, so it makes me over-the-top giddy when I do.

Screen shot 2013-02-02 at 12.37.48 AM

(Sorry, WordPress doesn’t like MTVK’s embed code, so the best I can do is insert an image and link it to the MTVK page…)

Jaejoong released his first solo mini-album, entitled “I” on January 17th.  He also released a video for “Mine” the album’s lead single. I wasn’t sure what I thought of it at first, but I was also sick and cranky at the time, but after a couple of views, I started to like it. Now, I love it. It’s a solid track and the MV supports the lyrics well. Here, check it out for yourself:

So different than what he’s done in the past, but at the same time, so completely and utterly Jaejoong. I think his voice suits the rock genre, and I get the feeling that he enjoyed the change of pace.  I also love that he was brave enough to step outside the pop idol box and do something unexpected and different. He didn’t stay within his performance comfort zone, and I respect him for that.

I love the entire album and strongly recommend that if you like this song, you should absolutely buy the album. I got my copy from Kpopmart.com, who are super fast at shipping stuff out, and they even send you pictures of your order packed in the shipment box, when they send out your confirmation. YesAsia.com is also a great, reliable source for any Kpop purchases, but not quite as quick with delivery as Kpopmart. Or, if you prefer to do it digitally, it’s also available on iTunes.


Jaejoong on MTVK

Woohoo! MTVK will be airing an exclusive interview with Jaejoong. They posted a teaser today and my oh my is Jaejoong ever sexy when speaking English. The image below links to the video on MTVK because WordPress doesn’t seem to like MTVK’s embed code…

Kim Jaejoong on MTVK

After working with Junsu on Uncommitted, Bruce “Automatic” Vanderveer tweeted some highly complimentary things about him Bruce “Automatic” Vanderveer has also previously worked with singers such as Christina Aguilera, The Wanted, Leona Lewis and more.





View original post 6 more words